Oh boy, do I like caffeine. MMM HMM. Well, I tell people that it’s really the coffee I love, but if that were really true, why on earth do I overload my mug with skim milk and Splenda? (Not quite as bad as my friend Ria, who puts so much half and half in her coffee that she doesn’t even refer to it as her morning cup, but rather, her morning milkshake.) It’s gotta be the actual addictive.
Those of us who like to drink coffee on a regular, if not obsessive basis, can all relate to the feeling of consuming too much caffeine, i.e., the feeling that you could rocket right out of your swivel chair at work.
Personally when I’ve imbibed a bit too much, my fingers get a little twitchy, and when I type, my words per minute rate probably triples. My mood switches from lethargic to super social butterfly Emily, and I furiously switch between Microsoft Word windows to Firefox, and open about a million tabs. I email everyone I’ve ever met in my entire life, and IM everyone on my Gchat list.
I usually jest that I am actually hallucinating during this phase of the caffeine buzz. Who needs to literally blow a few hundred or thousands of dollars on drugs when I can trip on my morning grande?
Well, guess what?
I WAS RIGHT!!
After conducting some research for one of my freelance gigs, I came across a new study:
“People with a higher caffeine intake, from sources such as coffee, tea and caffeinated energy drinks, are more likely to report hallucinatory experiences such as hearing voices and seeing things that are not there, according to the Durham University study.”
Fascinating. I mean, I knew that caffeine was a stimulant with mood altering magic, turning me from a morning Debbie Downer to a ILOVELIFE!, OHI’MBUYINGTHATSWEATERRIGHTNOW, or AWIHAVENOTTALKEDTOTHEMINALONGTIMEINEEDTOCATCHUPNOW sort of Splenda Stealer, but it’s a relief to know that I wasn’t really losing it. The researchers also say this type of hallucination tends to happen with people who have consumed over seven cups of coffee. I don’t drink that much, but I still blame the caffeine for my behavior.
In conclusion, I’ll take any study that comes my way and tweak it to make myself feel better.
Also, I admit that I laughed out loud when I read the following blog post. I really don’t remember how I came across this blog, but the blogger posted a pic of what she feels like after having too much coffee:
I could not have said it better myself.
Ed. note: Here is another example of a day with too much coffee. This is a post from my previous blogger life.